| F'ing awesome dream! |
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| 12:18pm 02/09/2007 |
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mood:  predatory
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I know there was way more detail than this that I could go into. I remember everything pretty clearly. I did leave out a couple details though. But this dream was awesome!
I was in this cabin with my aunt and uncle, mom and dad, Ryan, my cousin and I. I think elaine was there too. It was night out and we were down to explore this dock where a few kids were hanging out.
[12:02] : Somehow it looked more like an ocean at that point, and you could see these huge waves coming. A few kids about 4 or 5 years old jumped in off the dock, and a few older boys too. I stood at the beginning of the dock just watching until I saw the three little kids didn't come back up. I went down to the end of the dock and helped the two little boys up, but the little girl was under the dock in the sand (it was above water so no big deal.) Climbed under there, picked her up, and carried her back to a guy who was apparently her older brother.
[12:05] : Then I glanced out to the ocean and just watched it for a bit. It seemed just like a small bay with lots of these rock structures coming out everywhere. Old, wooden ladders and ropes were built around these rocks, and a small ship came to the dock (like an old pirate ship). I hopped on, and a brownish orange cat hopped on too and followed me around. A couple of the older boys joined me, and the ship moved off to the structures. I jumped and grabbed onto a ladder, and there was just a whole bunch of things to climb on and get a better look. For some reason it was light out now, like I was in a different world. The cat was having issues climbing and fell into the water, but I picked it up before it managed to get completely soaked.
[12:11] : The part of him that got wet turned invisible. I just looked at the cat like "wtf?" and put him back on the top ledge of this ladder, then climb up some more. A boy from somewhere shouted at me and said I better be careful, that someone was coming. I sat at the top of my little structure (it almost looked like badly made tree forts that had been hit by water over and over for years), and gazed out at the more open water. There I saw some huuuuuuuuuuge snowy owl, and the cat looks up at me and kinda nods. A voice suddenly came out of no where and told me to use the owl to get to him. (It was my friend Tony). He said that the owl probably wouldn't take me all the way, and would try to ditch me, but it was my only option to get to him quickly.
[12:16] : As the owl came by, I saw sharks begin to appear in the water below me. I jumped on the owl's back as it flew by and grabbed on for dear life. The cat was on my back too. For some reason I told the owl I needed to find this friend of mine, and asked if he knew what I was talking about. 'course the owl didn't say anything, but he took me deeper into whatever world I was in and there was a structure that had sand at the base instead of all this water. When the owl passed over this spot, I jumped off with the cat on my back and landed on the sand. My friend Tony came up and was about to say something when a large, scarred-faced man with a ragged outfit, almost like a pirate but not, shows up on this old, ghost looking pirate ship. He was at the upper part of this structure, Tony was at the middle, and I darted below the bottom of it and hid, listening. Tony kept backing up down the stairs and the pirate grabbed him by the throat and threw him down. I crawled through this opening between the planks and jumped in between my friend and the pirate guy. For some reason I said some type of spell, held up the back of my hand to him, and a glowing symbol appeared and shown a powerful, blinding light at the pirate that seemed to hurt and blind him momentarily. While the pirate was distracted, I grabbed Tony's arm and ran down the rest of the stairs. I cast some other spell and then I woke up |
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| Zombie dream |
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| 08:36am 05/07/2007 |
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mood:  amused
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Haven't posted in a while, but I felt this dream was worth a posting. I don't remember how it starts out, but the first part I remember is passing by this group of people, some were little kids and some were these like...babysitters or just care takers. This group of people were writing little messages and then releasing birds to another group of people. I stood next to one guy who turned out to be my friend Brett who was getting a lot of messages. He just kept laughing and shaking his head because all these middle school girls were confessing their love for him on these pieces of paper. I also cracked up when I saw how many he had, and a bird landed on me and gave me a message. I don't remember what it said, but they could say anything you wanted. I wrote him some crazy message, then in the smallest type I confessed my love for him in a joking manner and released the bird. It came to him, he got the message, and just started laughing. I gave him a little salute and walked off somewhere else because once they got a new group started I was the odd one out. And for some reason Elaine was floating around in this little hot air balloon, hahaha.
So after I left I went to my aunt and uncle's house where we were having this family get together. My brother and my friend Jessie were there, and after a while I was getting frustrated with my family so the three of us just went off into the back yard and around to the garage where we sat and drank. Some guy who owned the place but wasn't my uncle came into the garage where we were and drank with some of his buddies. We left and Jessie and I went into this hotel. We decided to go for a swim in the pool and just hopped in. What was weird is that it really didn't have water that I could see, but you could still float and swim, but were able to breathe too. I guess the water just disappeared after we found this little area that had little fake coins for kids to find (it was a pirate themed pool). I was taking pictures of this little shrine we found and Jessie was on the phone with my friend Amy telling her we would be back soon. But this like...mini temple was very weird...and suddenly little wisps were coming from this light in the roof of it and swooping down a tunnel. I kept watching them, and the wisps disappeared and five or more shadows came out and were these crazy zombie guys. They grew as they ran down the little shrine, and I told Jessie to run for it.
We ran into the lobby of this hotel and thought we had gotten rid of them (now back in original clothes and completely dry). So we just walked around for a bit, found Brett, my brother and some little girl. Just a whole group of people that I knew. But then I saw one, a different zombie coming up the stairs, and another coming up behind it. There were quite a few, and seemed to be coming from no where. There was liquor in the lobby so I popped a couple corks in the bottles and nailed the zombies. My brother followed my example, then we dumped the liquor all over the floor, fencing off where the zombies were coming from, and lit a match to hold them off.
We ran to the elevators and the doors opened to reveal more zombies. Some people got caught, others ran for it. Brett, Jessie, my brother and I all got away and ran for these stairs. We split off there. Jessie and I ran down while the other two ran up. There was this little tiny hallway that had a couple corners that Jessie and I hid in until some old woman zombie saw us. We shoved past her and headed out into the lower lobby and some crazy, fat long haired zombie saw us. I told Jessie to run back to the elevators and find Brett and Brian. We both ran for it, and the zombie RAN after us, chasing Jessie. I could see Brett and Brian on the upper level yelling down to us...so I knew we were in trouble. I ran after the zombie chasing Jessie and kicked his leg into the other so he would trip. Jessie made it to the elevator and I started getting surrounded by zombies. I could hear Brett and Brian yelling louder, and I looked up to them and mouthed "I love you", gave them a salute, smiled and nodded to Jessie as her elevator doors closed (she was screaming and crying for me to run, but there was no way to get out of the circle that had enclosed me), and then woke up. |
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| Wanted to save this... |
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| 02:08am 02/06/2007 |
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mood:  curious music: Silence
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Because my computer seems to have gone away from me for two weeks. :P Silly laptop in need of fixing. So instead I am going to post this random bit of writing here so I can remember it. It's nothing great, but maybe something will come of it.
______________________________
I was being led towards the tapping at the window. A blowing branch, perhaps? I drew back the curtains and saw a vision brought to me by moonlight...Curiosity turned to realization, I was struck to the floor by weakness in my knees. And there I remained broken as I saw his ghost vanish at my whispered grief. |
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| Not a fun dream |
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| 01:49pm 10/05/2007 |
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music: Hans Zimmer - "Red Warrior"
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Well I haven't posted here in a long ass time, so I figured I'd write down this very vivid dream I had last night. For me, it wasn't fun.
So my parents, the last time I was home, had been talking about how divorce is probably in the future soon.. and that filtered into my dream. Let me begin.
It started out in the house with me just sitting on the couch on my computer. Elaine was there too, and my brother, and we were all just chillin' in the area and enjoying some relaxation time. My mom comes in and goes off, saying how she's going to a custody hearing with my father because they were getting divorced. I was like "Ok, whatever." and she flips out on me, asking if I even cared and whatnot. Screaming and screaming at me. I just sat there, taking it, and mentioned how I wasn't going to choose. She's yelling how I had to decide, that I must decide, and so I said I would choose whoever got the house to save anyone from moving my stuff out. And somehow she thought my father would get the house, so she's like "You chose him! You hate me! You are siding with your father!", just yelling like crazy in tears. This was the point where I couldn't take it anymore. I stood up, set down my laptop, and slapped her hard across the face and screamed at her, saying "How can you expect me to choose? You are both my parents! I am not choosing!" My mom went silent and walked off after kinda laughing about how I had slapped her pretty hard. I sat down at my laptop in silent anger, just staring at the screen and typing stuff. Elaine and Whitney, who was there now, looked at each other in utter shock.
Eventually I left the house and went off to this run down street market. There a young man came up behind me and hugged me. I'm guessing my boyfriend at the time. Surprise for me was he proposed that day. We went back to the house and I looked around, saying "We can't stay here." and he understood. I took his hands and faced him, and told him to think of a happy memory. He nodded, closed his eyes, and when I had checked that he had a memory I closed mine as well and began to picture the stars. I felt myself lifting off the ground, and I heard him slightly panic as we hovered. He looked at me, and I smiled, and let go of one hand to touch the ceiling. We began to pass through it, and fly to the second floor that had only wooden, rundown planks because my mom was rebuilding. I stopped on a rafter and stood there when I heard my mom calling for me upstairs. But I had made my decision, and with a bit more effort we passed through the ceiling and flew into the sky. I looked to the stars, and saw three (two which were glowing very brightly). I whispered to myself "Second star to the right...straight on til morning." and headed toward it.
(I'm just going to copy and paste this part from telling someone because this was kinda boring and I don't remember it in much detail.)
When we got to Neverland, it wasn't Neverland at all. It was taken over by these creatures... and they were trying to kill us so we had to hide out. And someone familiar to me was saying how I needed to fight with this liquidheat. I was like "wha...?" and he pointed below these floorboards that had no holes. I was like..ok..and reached down through the boards just like I had flown through them, and I had the ability to see through the floor when I did this. One the ground was this melted graphite looking stuff, and I touched it. Really hot for a second, then it cooled on my fingertips. When I pulled it up and flicked it onto some like...paper, it lit it on fire and exploded. I was like "Holy shit." so I collected some of it. If you mixed it with liquid it would explode like a volcano. And we ended up using that to force our way to safety.
That's all I really remember. Craziness, and not very happy at some points because who knows what will happen when my parents finally divorce. Obviously it will just be another blow to deal with, and hopefully my mom doesn't flip out on us kids. |
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| The teacher was right. |
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| 10:25am 16/10/2006 |
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mood:  sick music: TV
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So I'm taking this Holocaust in Context class. The teacher said that she teachs different things, not just about all the death and whatnot, because otherwise we start dreaming about it. Well, I guess her tactic didn't help. I had a pretty awesome dream, though I don't remember all the details.
I remember being in this open room with tables and chairs everywhere in some business building. A lot of people were there with me, in hiding. All of a sudden someone shouts out "They're coming!" and we hear the engines of planes above us. Actually, the building was broken down, so you could see through broken areas of the roof and spot the planes. We saw them, and everyone started running around. A bomb broke through the ceiling, and landed right next to me. Many more followed, all landing down on the ground. I kicked the bomb away from me and ran for it, ducking underneath a table and crawling away. The bomb opened up releasing some sort of gas. It didn't kill us, I don't know what it was doing..it just sort of created a smoke. Once those were done dropping, another longer and slimmer bomb came crashing through the roof. It jetted into the wall and exploded. A few people were killed, and even more were running around like crazy. I ran outside and saw the planes coming overhead. I ran to another building after I saw soldiers coming down the street.
It kinda skips around from there, I remember having run into soldiers and having to hide behind things, dodging bullets and missiles that were raining from the sky. I eventually found a dark building where a couple of us hid in a small room with a few dogs. But then the German soldiers had dogs... and they found us. The dogs came at us, and we ran for it into the guns of the soldiers. My two friends were killed, but somehow I managed to escape and American soldiers shot the Germans that were about to kill me. I stayed with the soldiers, watching out some windows in a broken down building as I spotted the American snipers across the way.
I know at another part I accidently shot an American shoulder that surprised me, but I also managed to take out two enemy soldiers that were about to kill an American soldier.
That's all I remember. I wish I remembered more because it was an amazing dream.
x.x...and now I must go rest. I am sick and threw up this morning so I'm not very happy. Eeww. |
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| I'm trying... |
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| 08:56pm 05/10/2006 |
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mood:  disappointed music: Phantom of the Opera - Theme Song
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It's been a while, hasn't it?
Well now I am here, badly wounded and fighting to keep my strength and balance. I've never been beaten in such a way... It's more like being torn to shreds than anything. But still I'll manage without you, without the support I've looked for in you.
I come to you, the emptiness of the page, to write down what "blood" may come from my wounds. I have lost another. Not to death, no. That would be such a different twist. I lost it to the drama that is life and love, for his friendship with me was only costing him. And so, when I had held so tightly to him, looking up to him like he was my older brother..the one thing I always wanted... he left me behind. He abandoned me. Abandoned again.. Why? Why am I so easy to just cast asside?
I was there for you whenever you needed, through the pain and recovery of -your- wounds. I was there to help, to give advice or opinions when you asked it of me. You returned these things, each of us cared for the other. And you held me that night I needed a shoulder to cry on, one of the only people I've let see me cry. I know I have meant something to you, I know that you care... you just aren't allowed to care anymore, you aren't allowed to even speak. You were forced to say goodbye... but why isn't there another option? Why do I have to lose you?
I will have to forget that you exist... I will still remember the times we had, but they fade day by day.. I can't even remember your face anymore.
She didn't let you say goodbye to me when you left in person, and then all you left me was a few words in text...saying goodbye because you thought it was too hard over the phone. I cried that night.. I've never cried so hard in my entire life. And tonight I cry again as I am brought to the realization and reminded that I will never be able to see you, to talk with you, or to even have any sort of contact with you.
I'm still hurting... And I don't know how long it will take me to recover. But I'll struggle on my feet and hold my chest, making sure I won't make the mistake of trusting that deeply again. Only rely on yourself, no one else. No one else. |
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| Bad luck, good luck Dream |
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| 12:51pm 23/05/2006 |
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mood:  lazy
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Finally, I cool dream I can kind of write about!...I don't remember most of it, but I know some parts.
I'm in this mansion that is really old and beautiful. (What mansion isn't beautiful though?) Anyhoo, I think I was a servant there to a little boy that was about 10 because it was my job to follow this boy around and keep watch of him. The part I remember starts out with him walking around the yard from the back of the yard to the front by the driveway. His sister, who was younger, and an older brother who was a little older than me were out doing something there. I'm not entirely sure what. A tree had these berries littered all over the driveway and the kid started playing in them. I stood there, kicking the berries around with my shoe and poking at some of them when all of a sudden the older brother shouts something is wrong with the younger brother. He had collapsed for some reason, and the older brother realized what the boy had been playing with and was allergic to these berries. He quickly yells to me and I pick up the kid, running back to the house. He was getting heavy to carry, and I had a ways to go to get back to the house. I knelt down on one knee with the kid still in one arm and touched the ground. I glanced over my shoulder to see if the older brother was looking at me, and sure enough he was. It didn't matter and I vanished from his sight and appeared at the front door of the house where I took the boy to his mother and she took care of him.
Now shamed that I had exposed my "abnormal" side to the family, I walked into another room with my head hung and sat in the middle of the floor. The little sister and older brother came running inside, but the older brother stopped to look at me while the other went ahead to see her brother. He sat down beside me and said nothing for a while.
At this point, let me explain. There are two worlds in this dream. One is a world that uses good and bad luck as a sort of magic. The other is just the human world. Humans can't see the creatures that cause the bad luck and they can't use magic either. My character, for some reason, was from the good luck side and was human.
While the two of us sat in the middle of the dark room, a creature suddenly appeared in front of me. It was like a little goblin the size of a softball. He hopped around and cackled at me and more of them started to appear. These were the "bad" creatures that cast bad luck on people, or just other random things. Since I had used my magic to help save a human boy, they weren't very happy. I said nothing but looked rather pale and hid behind the older boy. He looked at me, then looked where I was staring, and something must have come into focus. "The legends are true then.. I see them, too." One jumped at me and I grabbed it, breaking its neck. The creature cackled on the floor with its neck bent and said "Now your back will break!" But nothing happened. I stood up and headed toward the door, but suddenly fell through the floor when I stepped on the rug. Before I fell through to the basement I had grabbed the side of the hole and pulled myself up as little creatures jumped below my feet trying to stab me with their little weapons. The guy stood up and grabbed my hand, leading me outside. The little brother and sister were out there now, playing.
I remember a part where the window shatters on a car in another driveway. I tried to put it back together with my magic, but it shattered again because of the little creatures and their bad luck. The little brother looked at me, quite puzzled by what I was doing. We wandered to the back yard again where a party was taking place. The mother and father were very rich and hosting a lovely party so everyone was there in fancy dresses and outfits. I was there in a rather ..raggy outfit, haha. There were people dancing and standing around talking with wine glasses in hand. The little sister and brother sat down, but the older brother took me hand and asked me to dance. And so we danced, and spun, and all that good stuff. Later we went into the house and sat on some couches where people were talking and having drinks. The older brother and little brother sat on the couch while the little sister disappeared somewhere. Since my magic was already exposed to these two, I decided to have some fun. The bad luck creatures kept blowing out all the candles in the room, so I would target a candle and move my hand in some weird way so the candle would re-light. The boys delighted in watching me do this, and each time I succeeded the next flame would be even brighter. At the last pair of candles they ignited with little shimmers along with it. It was really pretty and the boys cheered. A man next to me picked up a horse figurine on the piano and I pointed my finger at it...and it started to whinney and gallop for just a second. The man looked puzzled, but the two boys just giggled at me.
We left that room and went out to the back patio where I leaned on the rail with my elbows and watched the little sister and brother playing again. The old brother came up behind me and turned my head, kissing me. "Did you always watch over us?" And I gave him a nod before looking back to the kids.
That was when I woke up. Very odd dream, and I'm sure I missed a LOT of part and details... oh well. :} |
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| 04:47pm 24/04/2006 |
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mood:  blank music: TV - some spy show?
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Well, just read an email from my mom confirming earlier suspicions when she called and I didn't answer.
My grandpa died at noon today, which was kinda expected after his month in and out of the hospital.
That's about all the update I got for ya. Back to writing my paper. |
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| Stupid stupid stupid. |
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| 01:18am 24/04/2006 |
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mood:  cranky music: Silence.
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God DAMN IT.
I dunno why I'm so frustrated, but man am I getting pissed off right now.
People? Perhaps.
Myself? Could be.
Man do I need a release... I need something familiar.
I need someone that actually understands.
I'm going to bed with tears in my eyes and a few thoughts I'd rather not be having right now. Rarararararar.
Goodnight. |
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| No place to call home. |
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| 09:26pm 14/04/2006 |
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mood:  stressed music: Stabbing Westward - "Sleep"
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Home, no...my house... Why did I come back here again? x.x Remind me please as to why I thought this would be a HAPPY place?!
FUCK no. Only three hours I'm home and already I wish I was back at school hanging out with the Allen hall gang. Or not even that, just away from here would be fine.
So dinner was all good and everything, but after dinner my mom and aunt Susi are talking about, of course, my father and that whole situation. Here they are, whispering and saying little things while I'm in the other room. I told them to stop whispering and they said it was nothing I couldn't hear. That it was about if I had anything to say to my father I should get it off my chest. At this point I just kinda shrugged and didn't say much. My mom comes about with a comment on how that's the problem with "this one", "She just brushes things under the rug and pretends nothing happened." She complains about how I don't talk about it with her. Mind you I am BURNING about that comment. I just want to shove it back in her face, but I'll restrain myself and hold my tongue.
I think most of you understand, at least those that actually keep up with my journals or rants, that I don't have anything against my father. In fact, the issue is with my MOTHER. I can't tell her that because she'd flip out and have another stroke. Oh but yes, I just brush things under the rug, HA. -.- If only she knew how I hold my tongue for her own good, for her own health and safety. That I "brush it under the rug" so that she isn't heartbroken with the fact I don't side with her. She'll never understand.
I'm going to take a shower.... then I'm going to cruise around blasting music in my wonderful car until Pat or Tony get a hold of me.
I have no home. |
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| You make me hurt inside! |
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| 01:15am 11/04/2006 |
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mood: Lmfao music: Futurama! :D
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I'm going to cry myself to sleep tonight.
Why? ;-;
Because Zak's a douche. ;-;
zak (1:13:54 AM): yeah well....fuck you
;-;
Lmfao. xD |
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| need to work out...yees... |
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| 12:16am 10/04/2006 |
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mood: satisfied music: Era "The Mass"
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Ooohhh man did I get my ass kicked in CTF...
But it felt SO GOOD to run and sprint and get out and DO something.
:D I was dodging like crazy! But still getting caught...haha. Curse you Zak! I'll get you next time you try to cross my line.. >.> ::shake fist::
omg I'm dead...
x.x. goodnight. |
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| Ahh, to be 21. |
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| 12:44am 09/04/2006 |
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mood: relaxed music: Suikoden III - Opening Theme
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Ahh...and I'm finally 21.. And today and last night were awesome.
So Tony and Pat came down Friday. Elaine, Tony, Pat and I went out to the bars and had some fun drinking and dancing it up. No fun getting knocked in the head though, haha. But still all good. We came home and eventually crashed while watching Silence of the Lambs. Pat got scared as hell because he didn't know I put the TV on sleep and when it turned off when he saw the remote on the desk and no one pushing the button...yeah it was funny.
Today I was a zombie. We were supposed to play CTF, but Zak and Heather didn't get back til really late and everyone was kinda debating it anyway. Instead we did some extreme jumping, then went on the roof and listened to Zak and Sig sing and play guitar. :) It was awesome.
New friend of the week: Heather. She's very cute and sweet. Zak's girlyfriend, too. :D Quite an amusing gal and it's very cute to see them together.
The two of them made me think tonight. Any couple would have had the same effect, haha, but being up on the roof beneath the stars listening to the guitar? Quite nice. And what could be more romantic than snuggling up with your lover because you are cold? Haha. It made me desire a relationship again even though I've told myself that I don't want one for a long while.
:) Ah well. Maybe some man can break the ice forming around my heart. |
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| Getting it off. |
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| 12:20pm 07/04/2006 |
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mood:  chipper music: None.
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x.x... I had a nightmare again.
Normally I wouldn't say that, I'd just call it a dream, but these are getting to be a pain in the ass and making me nervous.
It was a dream about the situation with my mom and dad again. Now granted these are totally fictional as far as setting and what actually happens in the dream, but the main themes are still the same. Brief summary:
My dad comes to the house to visit and my mom totally flips her lid.
Accuses me of taking dad's side, always defending him and never her.
Sobs, cries, etc. trying to get sympathy.
My dad ends up leaving with my mom screaming on his heels.
I bitch her out because she's in the wrong.
She stares at me, then goes back to sobbing. I tell her to knock it off and calm down so she doesn't have another stroke.
I think my biggest fear is that this stuff will actually come true in a more real scenerio. My mom and dad could very well get into a bitching match (where my dad will just hold his tongue and leave) that will result in my mom getting upset and having a stroke. She's not strong. Not at all. And there might be a time where I have to face that my mother is going to die on me relatively soon. After all, her brother just died this summer. x.x... scary thought.
o_O And apparently my grandpa is slowly going toward his death bed too. e.e Sorry this isn't such a happy post. I'm actually in quite a good mood. But I needed to get that dream off my chest because it was really bugging me.
Later guys. |
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| Old dream I forgot to post here. x.x Must..remember..all..dreams.. |
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| 11:01am 04/04/2006 |
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mood: dead music: Roomie breathing... creeepy.
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Okay, this is what I typed to Mike in an email. So at the "you" parts, it's referring to Mike, haha.
_____________
I had a REALLY neat dream last night. You, Jordan, and Josh were in it (Josh played the main villian, apparently.) It was very cool. It was a fantasy dream, very strange. Picture Spirited Away type creatures and colors except instead of a bath house it was a huge mansion that was more of a maze than anything.
I don't remember too many details, just different portions, so I will try to explain those.
I am walking up the stairs to go to bed. There was a previous portion of the dream where three people and I had been battling it out with some weird ghost creatures in the yard. They had overwhelmed us (by us I mean these three unknown people and myself.) so we retreated back into the house for the night, taking shelter there. It wasn't our house, but so many people and spirits lived there. It was weird..
Anyway, I'm walking up the stairs and find myself on the top level of the house which was open to the downstairs. I lean onto the rail and just look down at all these weird spirits (floating heads with long dread locks that had a faded look like ghosts.) There were other people walking around, too. You and Jordan were relaxing in a hallway playing some Go Fish, Josh was off to the side not really doing much of anything except staring at the ground. Eventually you guys must have decided to come up and get some sleep because I watched you disappear below me and heard you coming up behind me. I turned around to meet eyes with Josh, who seemed rather cold and callus. Jordan and you disappeared into one of the rooms upstairs, and Josh came over to me and kinda shoved me against the rail.
I was rather confused but nothing was ever said between us. I just looked at him and he seemed like he was after something because he gripped my shoulder hard with one hand and leaned in to kiss me. I kept leaning back away from him, but you can only go so far when pinned against a railing. I looked behind me, then back at Josh and for some reason his eyes relaxed me and put me into some weird trance thing. Taking that opportunity, he kissed me and pulled me against him.
When he kissed me, his other hand reached around and he dug his fingers into my back. I realized then what he was doing. I had a power that wasn't really...matured yet. (You know how in those animes the strongest character with the most power is usually the one that hasn't awakened yet? That was me.) A blue aura began to wrap around me and flow into and around him. He was absorbing my power (my life force, actually) and stealing my life. Once this was complete, the spirits started gathering around and I collapsed. He caught me in his arms, though, can picked me up with his one arm hooked under my knees and the other supporting my back. He jumped down from the upper level and landed down in the center of the house, kneeling on one knee before rising and looking around to all the other spirity things. They seemed mad and upset, glowing with the same blue aura that surrounded Josh.
You and Jordan had come out of your rooms at this point, along with other people and ghosts, looking from the upper levels down at the center. You and Jordan were yelling at him, asking him what the hell he was doing and had done. Josh just kinda laughed.
Out of no where this little creature (Picture a long-beaked bird with huge wings and no eyes.) appeared on Josh's shoulder. I imagine it was the guardian of my power or something like that. x.x Josh just thought it was some companion and didn't pay attention to it. The creature looked down at me and seemed to get really pissed off because it craned its neck around and bit Josh in the back of the neck. Josh kinda screamed out in pain and the creature removed a glowing sphere from the back of his neck (I think it was his soul...lol...my powers merged with it, of course.) It was gold and glowing all weird like. Josh collapsed and I was dropped to the floor. The creature landed down next to me and placed the sphere into my back.
o_O And that's all I remember, haha. It was a pretty sweet looking dream. I wish you could see what was in my head. Not entirely sure why Josh was the main villian character, haha, but that's okay. It was a good dream. |
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| Don't let it break. |
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| 01:53am 04/04/2006 |
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mood: calm music: Swing Life Away - Rise Against
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Not again, you can't let it happen. If you do, it will be destroyed. You know it can't take much more.
You have to grasp tight this time and stick to what you tell yourself.
Don't let him beyond the gates this time, don't let him in. Keep him away.
You can stand on your own two feet, you know you can. So don't give up, don't give in, and keep yourself strong like always. Smile through even the darkest of hours and smirk at the hint of anything bad coming your way.
This is my own little talk to myself, advicing me against certain things. |
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| Past rekindled. |
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| 05:04pm 03/04/2006 |
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mood: rejuvenated music: Era "The Mass"
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Time for a real post? Maaaaaybe.
I was beginning to think that coming to this college wasn't my best decision. My grades haven't been the best, the teachers I have are absolutely horrible, and before this weekend my social life had really been zero asside from my roommate. o_o But that's the bad way of looking at it. :D On the good side I sleep a lot and relax and play video games in my room.
This weekend changed my college situation quite a bit. I was all excited to go out and socialize with some girls from my math class. And well.. I got ditched. :P Lol. Hopeless. But while I sat outside figuring I'd never get a phone call, I watched a very amusing group of people jump some railings. Eventually I was joined by my friend Emily who said she would wait with me for the phone call.
The phone call never came, but I'm really glad it didn't. That night, instead of going out to the bars and being someone I'm not, I found myself again in a group of people that I've never seen before. It's...insane how much this reminds me of the old group. And with a friendly invite from one guy, I was able to watch the fun up close..and then take part in it. Needless to say there were so hilarious moments in that whole scene.
I'm laughing at myself right now, but I won't say why...
I just keep thinking that this is so similar... I'm being given a second chance? I fucked it all up last time, I don't want to repeat my mistakes this time and screw any chances of keeping these guys as friends. It's good to feel accepted for who you really are. I'm no longer a hermit because of them, but they'll never know how much I appreciate that night I was able to join them in the gaming fun of Halo 2, haha. I'll give them a silent salute and a whispered thanks for giving me back who I really am.
All right, enough sap.
I can't fuck this up, not this time. |
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| o.O Curious... |
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| 02:11am 09/02/2006 |
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mood: curious
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| Your Seduction Style: Au Natural | 
You rank up there with your seduction skills, though you might not know it.
That's because you're a natural at seduction. You don't realize your power!
The root of your natural seduction power: your innocence and optimism.
You're the type of person who happily plays around and creates a unique little world.
Little do you know that your personal paradise is so appealing that it sucks people in.
You find joy in everything - so is it any surprise that people find joy in you?
You bring back the inner child in everyone you meet with your sincere and spontaneous ways.
Your childlike (but not childish) behavior also inspires others to care for you.
As a result, those who you befriend and date tend to be incredibly loyal to you. |
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| Just a random thing that was in my profile. |
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| 11:41pm 05/02/2006 |
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mood:  bored
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Sometimes I see him through the distorting rivulets, standing there outside my window. I'd press my face to the glass, peering harder through this rippled world just to see him one last time. But when the rain goes away and the droplets disappear, my soldier is no longer there.
Left with my reflection in the glass staring back at me, the window blurs again as I feel the warmth trickle down my cheeks. |
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mischiefmaker's journal
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